None of us want to admit it, but we all have it. Or have had it at some point. Emotional pain that just won’t go away. Sometimes we think we’ve stuffed it, but then – bam – something seemingly innocent happens and it all comes crashing back. Daniel was so past his divorce. He’d made […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/PainThatWontGoAway-495x400.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-06-01 03:00:002023-10-10 04:34:08What to Do when the Pain Won’t Go Away
As Christians, we are Jesus’ hands and feet. Jesus’ mouthpiece. The presentation of Jesus’ heart to the world. The uncompromising truth of God’s holiness walking lockstep with Jesus’ sacrifice and compassion for the world. The church should be the most compassionate place on earth. And yet, the church has a problem. It’s made up of […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/HowToSpeakTheTruthInLove-495x400-1.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-05-18 03:00:002022-05-18 04:41:08How to Speak the Truth in Love
We all understand that abuse is harmful. It leaves deep scars and wounds on our heart, especially when committed by the people who should have loved us. That’s Type B trauma—a “Bad” thing happened. We all get that abuse is really bad. But Type A trauma—the “Absence” of the necessary good thing—is still trauma. But […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/Why-Neglect-Is-Just-As-Harmful-As-Abuse-495x400.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-05-11 03:00:012022-05-11 04:49:22Why Neglect Is Just as Harmful as Abuse
Sarah was in church smiling, conversing with all her church friends. “If they only knew the mess in my life,” she thought every week, “they wouldn’t have anything to do with me.” So she kept pretending, and she was good at it. They all knew Sarah the Good Girl. No one knew Sarah the Alcoholic. […]
The truth is you have tremendous value. I have struggled actually believing this. Well, truth be told, I have no trouble believing you have tremendous value. I have trouble believing I have tremendous value. Can you relate? I’ve been asked by people I trust to share more of my story. So in the hope that […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/YouHaveValueMyJourneyThroughSelfHatred-495x400.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-04-26 03:00:112022-04-26 12:50:44You Have Value – My Journey through Self-Hatred
Too often, “how to walk a hard road” isn’t something we talk about enough in Western Christianity. Our life is so comfortable, on the outside at least, that too often we neglect talking about walking hard roads. And yet, although we have freedoms and conveniences, our lives can be just as painful and torn as […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/HowToWalkAHardRoadWith4Mindsets-495x400-1.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-04-19 03:00:002022-12-24 15:36:28How to Walk a Hard Road with 4 Mindsets
One of the biggest lies we constantly believe is our current situation is forever. It’s not. It’s a season. Whatever you’re struggling with, you don’t have to endure it forever. Unless you choose to. Here’s an example. For those of you who don’t live in the Washington DC area, Interstate 95 is a giant parking […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/HowToMakeItThrough-495x400.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-04-12 03:00:382022-04-12 05:31:19How to Make It Through to a New Season
People come to church in silent pain, isolated and hurting. “Look at all these happy people getting close to God. I’m the only one who’s faking it.” Nothing could be further from the truth. But we drive people to internalize and hide their pain because, by and large, the church doesn’t know how to help […]
This could quite possibly be the most important post I’ve ever written. It could save a life. It’s based on Sarah Robinson’s excellent post here (not an affiliate link). Sarah is a personal friend in our writer’s mentoring group, and a very strong believer. Please read her article, share it, and then come back and read […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/3-Ways-to-Help-Someone-with-Depression-495x400.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-03-30 03:00:232022-06-15 04:42:033 Ways to Help Someone with Depression
The most obvious signal of danger is fear. I wrote about the 3 types of fear here. A lot of fear is unhealthy and keeps us bound up by the enemy. But there is a good type of fear. Fear Means “Move Back” When the threat is real, healthy fear is a God-given emotion that […]
https://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2OppositeSignalsOfDanger-495x400-1.jpg400495Dave Wernlihttps://identityinwholeness.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/new_logo_menu.pngDave Wernli2022-03-22 03:36:022022-03-22 03:36:052 Opposite Signals of Danger and What to Do
What to Do when the Pain Won’t Go Away
/14 Comments/in Cornerstone Content, Inner Healing, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliNone of us want to admit it, but we all have it. Or have had it at some point. Emotional pain that just won’t go away. Sometimes we think we’ve stuffed it, but then – bam – something seemingly innocent happens and it all comes crashing back. Daniel was so past his divorce. He’d made […]
How to Speak the Truth in Love
/8 Comments/in Christian Living, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliAs Christians, we are Jesus’ hands and feet. Jesus’ mouthpiece. The presentation of Jesus’ heart to the world. The uncompromising truth of God’s holiness walking lockstep with Jesus’ sacrifice and compassion for the world. The church should be the most compassionate place on earth. And yet, the church has a problem. It’s made up of […]
Why Neglect Is Just as Harmful as Abuse
/6 Comments/in Cornerstone Content, Posts by Dave, Relationships /by Dave WernliWe all understand that abuse is harmful. It leaves deep scars and wounds on our heart, especially when committed by the people who should have loved us. That’s Type B trauma—a “Bad” thing happened. We all get that abuse is really bad. But Type A trauma—the “Absence” of the necessary good thing—is still trauma. But […]
Being Loved to Life—Authentic Christianity
/2 Comments/in Inner Healing, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliSarah was in church smiling, conversing with all her church friends. “If they only knew the mess in my life,” she thought every week, “they wouldn’t have anything to do with me.” So she kept pretending, and she was good at it. They all knew Sarah the Good Girl. No one knew Sarah the Alcoholic. […]
You Have Value – My Journey through Self-Hatred
/8 Comments/in Cornerstone Content, Identity, Inner Healing, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliThe truth is you have tremendous value. I have struggled actually believing this. Well, truth be told, I have no trouble believing you have tremendous value. I have trouble believing I have tremendous value. Can you relate? I’ve been asked by people I trust to share more of my story. So in the hope that […]
How to Walk a Hard Road with 4 Mindsets
/2 Comments/in Calling, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliToo often, “how to walk a hard road” isn’t something we talk about enough in Western Christianity. Our life is so comfortable, on the outside at least, that too often we neglect talking about walking hard roads. And yet, although we have freedoms and conveniences, our lives can be just as painful and torn as […]
How to Make It Through to a New Season
/12 Comments/in Christian Living, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliOne of the biggest lies we constantly believe is our current situation is forever. It’s not. It’s a season. Whatever you’re struggling with, you don’t have to endure it forever. Unless you choose to. Here’s an example. For those of you who don’t live in the Washington DC area, Interstate 95 is a giant parking […]
5 Ways to Validate Someone’s Pain
/2 Comments/in Healthy Church, Posts by Dave, Relationships /by Dave WernliPeople come to church in silent pain, isolated and hurting. “Look at all these happy people getting close to God. I’m the only one who’s faking it.” Nothing could be further from the truth. But we drive people to internalize and hide their pain because, by and large, the church doesn’t know how to help […]
3 Ways to Help Someone with Depression
/10 Comments/in Cornerstone Content, Healthy Church, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliThis could quite possibly be the most important post I’ve ever written. It could save a life. It’s based on Sarah Robinson’s excellent post here (not an affiliate link). Sarah is a personal friend in our writer’s mentoring group, and a very strong believer. Please read her article, share it, and then come back and read […]
2 Opposite Signals of Danger and What to Do
/0 Comments/in Christian Living, Posts by Dave /by Dave WernliThe most obvious signal of danger is fear. I wrote about the 3 types of fear here. A lot of fear is unhealthy and keeps us bound up by the enemy. But there is a good type of fear. Fear Means “Move Back” When the threat is real, healthy fear is a God-given emotion that […]