4 Healthy Ways of Relating to Jesus

I’ve found, in my life, there are 4 ways of relating to Jesus. Although I’ve worked through different ones at different times in my life, I think it’s healthy to have all 4 active at once, to one degree or another.

My regular readers know that, while, yes, I acknowledge good theology is important of course, I care very little for ivory tower discussions. So these 4 ways of relating to God are very practical. Each has a down-to-earth litmus test to see how you’re doing.

And the benefit of walking in all 4 is huge — living a life aligned with the heart of God. You’re grounded and safe. You grow. You’re not tossed around by every wind of disaster that feeds the news cycle. But you do your own work, leaning into the challenge the Holy Spirit brings to your heart and mind in each season of your life. You walk more and more in the fullness of who God created you to be. It’s a really great way to live.

As we talk through these 4 ways of relating to Jesus, think about how each is playing out in your life, which you lean into the most, and which you feel drawn to focus on more.

1) Relating to Jesus as God – Who do you worship?

This is often where we start. How do we relate to Jesus as God? As Christians, we typically give God Sunday mornings at church, half a day a week. And that’s good. Hopefully your weekly church service is a powerful time connecting with the larger Body of Christ and engaging with the Holy Spirit in corporate worship and really good teaching.

But in our hearts, what do we worship? Is that Sunday morning just checking a box? Is it just paying the dues on our fire insurance? Do we know our church friends any better than we know the checker at the grocery store?

What do we worship? What is your identity in? Family? Job? Technology? Sports? Cars? Travel? Politics? Being right?

None of those are bad things. But if we find our identity in them, they are an idol in our life. And our worship of God is compromised.

Relating to Jesus as God is really important and life-giving. But if our relationship with Jesus stops there, he becomes unapproachable. Away off in the heavens somewhere, running the universe, with no time or patience for my little life.

Paradoxically, when we think God is too big to care and/or too busy to deal with what’s going on in our life, we actually dishonor God by making him really small. As if he doesn’t have the bandwidth to run the universe and be present with me in my life. That’s why it’s so important to also relate to Jesus in these other ways as well.

2) Relating to Jesus as Savior – Who do you trust?

As Christians, we’ve all given our hearts to Jesus, accepting his sacrifice on the cross for our salvation. We’ve prayed the prayer. We’ve surrendered our place on the throne of our life.

But have we given him our pain? Do we trust him with that? This is not a “one and done.” This is a continual thing, trusting him more and more, with deeper wounds in our heart, in different seasons of our life.

It’s counter-intuitive, but it’s actually God’s grace when the coping mechanisms we use to deal with the pain in our life stop working. The Holy Spirit is highlighting the area of our life that Jesus wants to heal next. Are we going to trust him with that pain?

3) Relating to Jesus as Lord – Who do you obey?

Christianity isn’t fire insurance. “Ok, Jesus, I intellectually accepted you into my heart, whatever that means, so I’m going to heaven. Glad that’s settled. Now I can live however I want.” It doesn’t work that way.

We can’t accept Jesus as Savior without also accepting him as Lord. It’s a package deal. Jesus said it himself when he was talking with his disciples at the Last Supper:

“Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me.” – Jesus in John 14:21

In our overly sexualized society, a great litmus test for this is sexual integrity. Are you saving sex for marriage, or are you on the hunt for someone to sleep with? Is that even a boundary we draw as unhealthy behavior?

If we support Biblical morality and sexual integrity, would someone know that based on the media we consume? The music we listen to? The movies we watch? The influencers we follow? The friends we keep?

It’s not about being legalistic. But what we feed our spirits by what we listen to, watch, consume, and participate in is either drawing us closer to God or pushing us from him.

Is Jesus Lord of every part of our life? Or only for a few hours on Sunday morning?

4) Relating to Jesus as Friend – Who do you live with?

It’s beautiful to relate to Jesus as God by our worship, as Savior by our trust, and as Lord by our obedience.

Relating to him as friend is the crown of the human experience. To experience that, not only did he create you and save you and lead you, but also that he likes you – I just don’t have the words for it.

Do we do life with Jesus? Do we share the ups and downs? Do we chat with him all day in our thoughts? Not as something we have to do or struggle to do, but as something that just happens?

In that same conversation at the Last Supper, Jesus invited us into friendship:

“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” – Jesus in John 15:15

He’s not withheld anything from us. Do we withhold anything from him? Or do we do life with him?

The 4-Way Invitation

My prayer for us is that there would be no condemnation in reading this post. Has reading this post brought up a way that you don’t relate to Jesus as well? Look at that as an invitation to enter a season of learning to relate to him more and more in that way.

None of us do this perfectly; I certainly don’t. But may we all love the learning. May we all lean into his invitation to us individually, in this season. I’m excited about what’s next for you. And for me.

Your Turn

Does this resonate? In which of these ways do you relate to Jesus the most? The easiest? The hardest? Which is the most surprising? Tell us your story in the comments.

Do You Want Help?

Does this post bring something up for you? Is the Holy Spirit highlighting an area in your heart he wants to heal next? Or heal deeper? Reach out to Dave and Janet for an inner healing session. We use a combination of Biblical truth and brain science to facilitate a safe, gentle way to experience a two-way connection with Jesus, get unstuck, and receive the healing he has for you.