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Most relationship problems, and you could even say most sins in the world, come down to problems with this one thing. Boundaries. And most boundaries problems come down to the refusal to either hear or say one of two little words. “Yes” and “no.” [The concepts in this post come from the excellent book Boundaries by […]
As we teach and write about Christian identity, we find one of the biggest obstacles to really finding and walking in our true identity is forgiveness. Nothing will derail the calling on your life more than unforgiveness. Yet, we find many Christians don’t really understand forgiveness. There’s a key ingredient to forgiveness that’s counter-intuitive, that […]
Often we choose bondage over freedom. Sounds strange, doesn’t it? Who would do that? We don’t do it intentionally. We don’t even realize we’re doing it. But we do. We do it when we choose the sick familiar over the healthy unknown. The dysfunction we grew up with is familiar. We think it’s normal, even […]
At a recent writer’s conference (Jeff Goins’ Tribe conference), I heard a speaker, Joseph Michael, author of the online course Learn Scrivener Fast, say he was thankful for his failures. I’d always known intellectually that failures are good for you. As long as you learn something, failures are learning experiences. They’re a necessary part of […]
Pain is something we don’t understand very well, especially here in the West. We avoid it, medicate, and ignore it, none of which actually fixes it. But pain is important. It’s telling us something’s wrong that we need to address. Pain is like the idiot light on your dashboard. What if the oil light comes […]
The concepts in this post come from Danny Silk’s book, Keep Your Love On: Connection, Communication, and Boundaries. This book has really rocked my world. I wish I’d read it 20 years ago. A short, easy read, it’s one of those books that you want to read every year. I cannot recommend it highly enough. […]
A while back I had a good Christian friend named Nate who had a small boat we’d take out on the Rappahannock River here in Virginia. We had some great conversations out there on the water. After one of these outings, when we got back to his house, somehow we got onto a subject we […]
Agreement is powerful. We all know that. Jesus himself said, “Truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.” (Matthew 18:19) But what we may not know is there are 3 different sides of agreement. Like […]
Are you stuck? We all get stuck at some point. Is it an addiction you just can’t lick? Is it depression that just won’t end? Is it a mid-life crisis, realizing you’ve ended up with some boring, dead-up life and your dreams have all but vanished? Feel like you just can’t get there from here? […]
There’s a world of difference between controlling someone out of fear and confronting them out of love. When we have to deal with someone else’s bad behavior, we have a choice. We can try to control the other person and manipulate them into doing the right thing. Control is hypocrisy because we’re trying, by sinful […]